3 things to expect this January

Next Story

Ed Woodward travels around the world for 'important transfer business'

Manchester United’s extremely ‘popular’ supremo conducts ‘important transfer business’ around the world.

Then he makes outrageously underwhelming bids for players all over.

While he awaits the inevitable negative response from clubs, he signs United’s new official petrol partner and new energy drink partner.

After the transfer window is over, Woodward describes keeping the players (Wayne Rooney, Robin van Persie etc) at the club as his most significant achievement. 

As Woodward is busy making a hash of things in the transfer negotiations, poor David Moyes parrots the 'Ed is working on it' line in every press conference while drinking the energy drink from United’s new energy drink partner.

Moyes also talks about the unlimited resources available to him as the Glazers take another truckload of money from the Old Trafford vault to service their debts.

Premier League
Manchester United
Next Story

Read more