I expect the vast majority of people reading this article have, at some point, watched an Arsenal game this season. Just incase you haven't, here's a summary of the season so far in bullet point form:
- Play well, lead the game, capitulate late on from a set-piece / wonder goal / Defensive howler
- Play terribly and lose without turning up
- Turn it on and annihilate mediocre opposition
- Steal the odd point against the run of play
- Capitulate again etc, etc
Now that's out the way, anyone with any interest in the Premier League will understand that Arsenal NEED to bring in an extra body or two. The issue is not that Arsene doesn't have funds at his disposal, his convenient excuse is always that the right player isn't available or they're not 'top quality with excellent mental strength and a working hand-brake..' Below are two key signings that Arsene could make that would improve our squad that fit the bill.
Time to ditch well-worn transfer links
But first, let's look at the 'cliche Arsenal transfer targets' and why they won't happen.
- Yann M'Vila - Death, taxes and Yann M'Villa being linked with Arsenal. It's his agent's special time of year again
- Mats Hummels - Dortmund are currently worse defensively than Arsenal and bottom of the Bundesliga. Won't represent value for money
- Morgan Schneiderlin - Saints won't sell their best player while flirting with Top 4
- Bender brothers - See Yann M'vila
Time to look for left-field signings
Arsenal are genuinely awful at set pieces, long balls and anything that involves an ounce of bravery on the football pitch. Per Mertesacker is still on holiday from the World Cup win and neither Calum Chambers, Laurent Koscienly nor Nacho Monreal are all being out performed aerially by Mathieu Debuchy... the short little right back.
Süle is a nutter. From watching him a few times this season, he reminds me a lot of Pepe from Real Madrid, just less evil and in-league with the devil. However, where he does excel is getting ahead in dangerous positions and winning aerial duels. He loves the gritty art of defending; blocks, clearances the odd dirty tackle - exactly what Arsenal haven't had since the Sol Campbell days.
To summarise; Süle is a big, angry German who would relish the Premier league.
Stark has a relatively lower profile in the game due to his young age. However, albeit being far from a professional scout, watching Stark is a lot like watching Chelsea standout Nemanja Matic.
They both look equally comfortable as a centre back as they do in midfield. He's 6ft 2, positionally sound, composed and loves to play simple. He'd still be raw and prone to errors, however there is a real chance he could become the Matic type Arsenal haven't had since Gilberto was last at the club.
Of course, what's most likely is that Arsenal won't sign anyone, fans on Twitter will go into meltdown, Arsenal will get all their players back and go on a run that secures top four.... another forgettable season and sense of deja vu that left to linger around the Emirates once more.