The 2015 NFL off-season has not been kind to the New England Patriots, to say the very least.
The Deflategate saga has followed New England around like a bad stink ever since the news broke that the Indianapolis Colts reported some footballs being deflated during the AFC Championship Game earlier in the year.
Well the punishments have come in and the NFL have not been kind to Tom Brady and the Pats. The Patriots have naturally appealed these punishments, but their reasoning is completely insane.
Bizarre and Ludicrous
The Patriots have fought back against the 243-page Ted Wells report with a website called 'Wells Report Context' that tries to discredit many of the findings of the investigation and picks apart bits of the executive summary. The Patriots have really gone all out on this website, it's made in WordPress and looks like a bad truther site.
The contents of the website is 20,000 words long, but damn, the Patriots are clutching at straws so much. Some of their explanations for the completely obvious text messages between Pats locker room workers Jim McNally and John Jastremski are bizarre, ludicrous and unintentionally hilarious.
In the two Patriots employees texts, which form the most incriminating evidence in the report, they talk about talked a lot about Tom Brady and deflating footballs a fair amount. At one point in the conversation, McNally even referred to himself as “The Deflator."
Don't worry though, the Patriots have a good reason for all this. McNally is just really fat and he was trying to lose weight, ergo "deflating." How silly of us to think it meant deflating footballs.
“Deflate” was a term they used to refer to losing weight...This banter, and Mr. McNally’s goal of losing weight, meant Mr. McNally was the “deflator.” There was nothing complicated or sinister about it."
"But what about the messages that mention Tom Brady by name' i hear you cry. Well according to the Patriots, it could be possible that they are talking about an entirely different Tom, or that the "He" they talk about is somebody from a completely different conversation.This is not your average straw clutching folks, this is the best of the best.
The Patriots are stooping so low they might put their back out. I wonder if that's a problem that could be fixed by correct inflation.