Right, this will be tough but try and read through this article without feeling incredibly jealous and bitter.
Just be happy for the fortunate so-and-so. Just like u…. Oh, who are we kidding?
How is it even possible to be this lucky?
An engineer called Joe from Liverpool is £37,000 richer today after pulling off what can only be described as a ridiculously impressive four-fold accumulator win.
Joe decided to put his usual weekly accumulator on the Checkatrade Trophy - previously known as the Johnstone’s Paint Trophy for those unaware of the recent rebrand - on Tuesday night and it will go down as one of the best decisions of his life.
The £1 bet
Betting with SkyBet, the lad put £1 - yep, a quid - on the following…
Oxford v MK Dons - Both Teams To Score In Both Halves (12/1)
Gillingham v Reading U21 - Both Teams To Score In Both Halves (12/1)
Port Vale v Crewe - Both Teams To Score In Both Halves (16/1)
Morecambe v Leicester City U21 - Both Teams To Score In Both Halves (12/1)
The odds were 37,349 but that didn’t stop Joe from hitting the ‘Bet’ button - and by full-time he was a much wealthier man.
Here’s how those matches finished…
Oxford 3-4 MK Dons
Gillingham 7-5 Reading U21
Port Vale 4-2 Crewe
Morecambe 2-2 Leicester City U21
The winning bet slip
Here's the winning bet slip in all its glory...
Joe should probably send a fiver in the post to Morecambe’s Elliot Osbourne, whose 90th-minute equaliser at the Globe Arena turned his losing bet slip into a winning one right at the death.
'I just picked the games randomly'
“I place a BTTS in both halves acca every week, and it was total luck that it's come off for me – I just picked the games randomly,” Joe was quoted as saying by the Daily Mail.
“I was following the games and it was so tense when I only need the goals in the Leicester game for it to come in.
“I couldn't believe it when Osborne scored in the 90th minute. I need to get in touch with him so I can shake his hand!
“When I see big winners on social media normally I never believe them, and I can't believe it's happened to me.
“I’m still in shock so I haven't decided on what to spend the winnings on.”
Fair play, mate.
Life isn't fair
Joe’s win comes a day after it was revealed that a woman from Kent won over half-a-million pounds from a 12-team accumulator over the weekend.
Life is not fair.
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