There is not much more that can be said about Real Madrid’s pre-season - it has been miserable.

The Spanish giants have shipped an alarming 16 goals in just five pre-season games, with fierce rivals Atletico Madrid hitting them for seven in a mad affair.

Star signing Eden Hazard arrived at the Bernabeu overweight and the cloud surrounding Zinedine Zidane’s public spat with Gareth Bale continues to hang over the team.

Lump some injury woes into the batch with Marco Asensio out for the season and Luka Jovic sidelined and the Madrid cake already looks like a Bake-Off disaster.

Japanese sensation Takefusa Kubo has been the only positive for Los Blancos in the build-up to the new season - twice voted as the teams best player during pre-season friendlies.

Zidane has to do something fast if he is to prevent the season from crashing and burning within before it has even started.

Fans want action, and many are demanding that it come in the form of a certain Paul Pogba.

The want-away star is doing everything he can to force a move away from Manchester United, but the English club are certainly playing hardball.

In fact, according to a report in the Mirror, it could end up costing Madrid and eye-watering £270 million to prize the World Cup winner away from Old Trafford.

Ouch.

United are expected to demand a fee of at least £150 million for a player they signed for £89 million just three years ago.

On top of that, the Spanish side will need to shell out a staggering £500 000 in weekly wages to the Frenchman who is reportedly after a four-year contract.

How’s your maths? £500k a week over four years?

£104 million.

Take a deep breath, it gets worse.

Super agent Mino Raiola is also demanding 10% of any fee brokered between the two clubs meaning the final, crazy tally adds up to that figure of £270 million.

Madness.

It is not often that Real Madrid are made to baulk at a fee but that is exactly what is happening in this case.

With Zidane’s future far from certain, you can hardly blame them for being cautious - especially when you consider that a certain Jose Mourinho is in the running to take his place in the Bernabeu hot seat.

There could be a few more twists in this one yet, but it is starting to look rather unlikely, isn’t it?