If all 20 Premier League managers had a normal job: Fan creates brilliant thread


Managing in the Premier League is the pinnacle of many managers’ careers.

It’s the league that everyone wants to be a part of.

The money, the players, the drama… England’s top flight has it all.

The list of current Premier League managers shows the level of the competition.

Pep Guardiola, Jurgen Klopp and Unai Emery have won European trophies while Mauricio Pochettino is one of the brightest minds in the game.

But where would they be if they hadn’t found their way into football management?

Twitter user @unrealxherdan has imagined what all 20 managers would be doing if they had a normal job.

Emery? A hotel manager in Benidorm. Ole Gunnar Solskjaer? Lives in his mum’s basement playing video games.


Take it away, @unrealxherdan

1. Jurgen Klopp (Liverpool)

Head of HR at an energy company in Germany, promotes green energy, cycling to work and a healthy work life balance.

Often seen smashed on a Thursday with the interns but gets in on Friday’s feeling fresh.

Aston Villa v Liverpool FC - Premier League

2. Brendan Rodgers (Leicester City)

A sales trainer and motivational speaker. Uses a lot of graphs and charts to make you go the extra yard. Improves performance by 150%. No one likes him.

Crystal Palace v Leicester City - Premier League

3. Frank Lampard (Chelsea)

Works in the centre of London in insurance. Earns a f*** ton even though no one really knows what he does.

Still finds time to coach his sons u-11 team on a Saturday. Hero.

Watford FC v Chelsea FC - Premier League

4. Pep Guardiola (Man City)

Maths lecturer. Absolute genius in his craft but is intolerant of his students.

Hates laughter. Struggles with normal human interaction. Sleeping on his mates sofa because his wife kicked him out.

Liverpool FC v Manchester City - Premier League

5. Chris Wilder (Sheffield United)

Runs a taxi firm. The finest in Yorkshire. Affordable with an excellent and efficient service. Not much banter though.

Sheffield United v Liverpool FC - Premier League

6. Unai Emery (Arsenal)

Hotel manager in Benidorm. Presentation is perfect but customer service is shocking. Changes the menu every week. All his staff want to leave.


7. Ole Gunnar Solskjaer (Man United)

Never had a job ever and lives in his mum’s basement playing video games.

Also runs a Man United fan channel like Mark Goldbridge moaning about how the club is run and saying he would do better.

Norwich City v Manchester United - Premier League

8. Nuno Espirito Santo (Wolves)

Male model for the older generation. A fashion and style icon that make the ladies swoon. Writes poetry in his spare time.

Wolverhampton Wanderers v Aston Villa - Premier League

9. Eddie Howe (Bournemouth)

PE Teacher that all the girls in his school fancy for no real reason. He's a nice guy but fully expect detention if you forget your kit.

AFC Bournemouth v Forest Green Rovers - Carabao Cup Second Round

10. Sean Dyche (Burnley)

Bouncer at some dodgy club. Doesn't look twice at the girls' ID but likes to give the lads a hard time. Loves to flex his muscles.


11. Graham Potter (Brighton)

Recruitment Consultant. Slick, trendy and will say anything to make you accept the offer. Also fronts an Oasis tribute band in his spare time.

Brighton & Hove Albion v Tottenham Hotspur - Premier League

12. Roy Hodgson (Crystal Palace)

Vicar of the local church in some sleepy southern village. Helps out at the fete and local library. All the old dears love him. Also a failed novelist.

Sheffield United v Crystal Palace - Premier League

13. Steve Bruce (Newcastle)

Butcher. Finest lamb chops in all the north east. Good honest labour. Always gives extra to the older ladies. Been known to eat all his stock.

Newcastle United v Brighton & Hove Albion - Premier League

14. Mauricio Pochettino (Tottenham)

Runs a trendy tech start up in London. Had a few really good years but now struggling because all his best members of staff want to leave.

Looking to sell up and join a bigger firm.

Crvena Zvezda v Tottenham Hotspur: Group B - UEFA Champions League

15. Marco Silva (Everton)

Currently unemployed after a string of high level jobs in big organisations for that he is unqualified for.

Is great in interviews but hasn't actually a clue what he is doing on a day to day basis.

Brighton & Hove Albion v Everton FC - Premier League

16. Manuel Pellegrini (West Ham)

Supply teacher. The Year 10 boys know it’s party time when Mr Pellegrini turns up.

Kids take advantage of his kindly nature and also the fact he is totally useless at his job.

Burnley FC v West Ham United - Premier League

17. Dean Smith (Aston Villa)

Has his own one-man-band painting and decorating firm.

Bombing round the midlands in his van making sure all your walls are looking fantastic. Reasonably priced, too.

Aston Villa v Wolverhampton Wanderers - Carabao Cup Round of 16

18. Quique Sanchez Flores (Watford)

Owns a nightclub in Ibiza just across the road from Lineker's. Is best mates with @waynelineker. Also rumoured to have starred in several adult films.

Manchester City v Watford FC - Premier League

19. Ralph Hasenhuttl (Southampton)

Skiing instructor. Looks cool and groovy as he’s swishing down the Austrian alps. Probably having an affair with your mum too.

Southampton FC v Everton FC - Premier League

20. Daniel Farke (Norwich City)

Rodie with German Industrial Rock band Rammstein. Has known to drive the tour bus after 10 pints. Never had a bank account or mobile phone.

Brighton & Hove Albion v Norwich City - Premier League

Brilliant. This is what Twitter is for.

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