These days, you’d be hard-pressed to find a professional footballer who hasn’t ever taken part in something media-related away from the pitch.
Regardless of how rich they are, all footballers need to think ahead towards life after they retire from the game, and the media has become a very desirable choice of industry for them.
If you turn on any football preview television show, you’ll see players being interviewed, taking part in live football challenges and trying their hand at punditry with an eye to the future.
However, because they all want to appear so polished and professional in front of the camera, we rarely see footballers on TV these days who are willing to make fools of themselves.
But fortunately, for our entertainment, Planet Football have unearthed an absolute goldmine of old television adverts which show professional footballers from the past doing just that.
They’ve managed to uncover 23 incredible television adverts for cars, fast food franchises, shampoo, phone companies, tomato juice and basically everything in between.
Here are our ten favourites from the bunch. We’ve listed them in no particular order, because realistically, how on earth do you choose between any of these?!
1. Peter Crouch - T-Mobile
This is a classic from Crouchy. We’re sure the marketing people at T-Mobile were all rubbing their hands with glee when they saw him bust out his famous robot dance.
2. Peter Schmeichel – Danepak
Terrible green-screen. Cringeworthy tune. Manchester United’s fearsome number one, Peter Schmeichel, being made to look utterly ridiculous by a bacon brand. We love it.
3. Rene Higuita – Frutiño
We suspected that we’d find Higuita in one of these adverts. We’re not sure how his famous scorpion kick helps to sell fruit juice, but never mind – it’s entertaining to watch.
4. John Arne Riise, Morten Gamst Pedersen, Erik Huseklepp – Bendit
Three for the price of one here. We’re not sure what they’re singing - the dubbing is truly awful – but something about seeing these three serious footballers try to lip-sync fills us with joy.
5. Shinji Kagawa, Robin Van Persie, Michael Carrick and Ryan Giggs – Kagome
We’re sure this wasn’t the highlight of their time at Manchester United. They’re definitely not drinking that tomato juice and there’s something behind their forced smiles that says, ‘get me out’.
6. Emmanuel Adebayor – Power Horse Energy Drinks
This makes a bit more sense as it requires some footballing skill. But Adebayor could do keepie-uppies before drinking the Power Horse, so frankly, we’re not sure why we need to buy it!
7. Blackburn Rovers – Venky’s
Eleven ex-Blackburn first team players are involved here. They say that Rovers are ‘proudly owned by Venky’s’, but if I were in charge of Blackburn, I’d have felt a little less proud after watching this.
8. Jimmy Bullard – Wash N’ Go
This list wouldn’t be complete without Jimmy Bullard – the one player who’s never had a problem with looking a bit silly. He’s the only player on this list who looks like he’s enjoying himself.
9. Gareth Southgate, Stuart Pearce, Chris Waddle – Pizza Hut
You’ve missed a crucial penalty for your country, you’re scared of being publicly shamed, but you want to go out for pizza with your mates, what do you do? You put a bag on your head, obviously.
10. Carlos Tevez – Cartoon Network
Why’s he there? What’s he advertising? What’s the relevance to Cartoon Network? This one, for its sheer madness, gives rise to far more questions than it answers.
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