Mario Balotelli is one of the most iconic footballers of his generation.
Blessed with copious amounts of talent and a distinct wild side, Super Mario has provided us with so much entertainment down the years.
From hosts of wacky celebrations to nearly burning down his house in Manchester courtesy of letting off some fireworks, Balotelli is just completely bonkers.
His career is so crazy that one day, when the Italian is retired but still wreaking havoc across the world, a television series needs to be made in his honour.
Don’t worry, we’ve got the layout of the ten-part series below! So get ready to relive some Super Mario madness, an absolute treat.
Episode 1: The one with the fireworks & the bathroom
The series is off to a flyer!
Some footballers kill time by playing video games and golf, whereas Balotelli passes the time by setting off fireworks in his bathroom.
He set his house on fire and then – just to add that little extra spice to the story – he was made Manchester’s ambassador for fireworks safety shortly after. Fantastic.
Episode 2: The one with the bar owner
A truly iconic moment.
Balotelli paid a bar owner in Naples €2000 to drive his moped into the sea, before paying the man and then sparking up a cigarette with the locals.
He even uploaded the footage to his own personal Instagram page!
Episode 3: The one when Mario met Roberto Mancini
Super Mario clashed with a lot of players in training during his career, but things genuinely got physical between him and Mancini at Man City in January 2013.
Player versus manager? Absolute scenes. It’s thought that Mancini reacted to one of Balotelli’s tackles on a teammate and things just kicked off.
No wonder he was sold that summer…
Episode 4: The one when Balotelli scored vs Germany
Balotelli has never been a player short on confidence. In fact, he once shouldered a ball into the net against Norwich just because he could.
But the manifestations of his ego were never more apparent after his brilliant goal against Germany at Euro 2012.
The sight of him standing bare-chested and tensing in front of the watching world is iconic – and one of football’s greatest ever memes.
Episode 5: The one with the back-heel
Will this ever not be funny? No, no it won’t.
In a pre-season friendly against LA Galaxy in 2011, Super Mario attempted – and failed – at showboating when through on goal, aimlessly back-heeling the ball wide after a suspect pirouette.
Mancini nearly had a break down on the touchline, before hauling Balotelli off. How did he survive at City until 2013?
Episode 6: The one when he crashed his car
Just two weeks into his City career and Balotelli was already delivering gold on English shores.
Stopped by the police after crashing his Audi R8 near City’s Carrington training ground, the officers on the scene were intrigued to know why the Italian had £5000 worth of cash in his pocket.
Super Mario replied: “Because I am rich.” How do you respond to that?!
Episode 7: The one when he conquered Instagram
We had to sneak in one of his escapades during his short time with Marseille.
He actually scored goals for fun out in France and to celebrate a sensational overhead kick against Saint-Etienne, he took the game to a whole new level.
Balotelli picked up his phone from the sidelines and proceeded to celebrate with his teammates while posting the footage live on Instagram. No one does it quite like Mario.
Episode 8: The one with the AC Milan shirt
A teenage Balotelli at Inter under Jose Mourinho was a recipe for disaster.
In 2010, shortly before the hotly-contested Milan derby, Super Mario was on television show Striscia La Notizia sporting an AC Milan shirt, under the assumption that the cameras were off.
Unsurprisingly, he was sold to City for £19m a few months after and it’s safe to say he’s not popular with the blue half of Milan.
Episode 9: The one with Mario and the woman’s prison
This one almost isn’t believable.
What footballer gets arrested for trying to get into a women’s prison without permission because he’s simply fascinated by such facilities? Balotelli, that’s who.
Apparently the Italian and his younger brother Enock didn’t realise you needed a special permit to get in…
Episode 10: The one with the bib
Who wouldn’t want to watch an entire episode dedicated to a professional footballer failing spectacularly at putting on a bib.
It’s a clip that is guaranteed laughs every single time and it really does make you wonder what’s going through the Italian’s head at times.
“I think I’m going to change his name to Bibotelli,” an iconic summary of the incident by ESPN.
Episode 11: The one with the celebration
The series finale simply has to be the single greatest celebration ever seen in the Premier League – and it’s not even close.
Imagine scoring a goal against your biggest rivals away from home and then revealing a shirt that says ‘why always me?’
Us mere mortals could not have even fathomed such an act in our heads, but Super Mario delivered it so bloody nonchalantly in front of the Old Trafford faithful. Undoubtedly his finest hour.
There are, of course, a litany of moments we couldn’t fit in.
From stealing a penalty from Jordan Henderson at Liverpool, to giving £1000 to the homeless in Manchester, Balotelli’s antics would all but certainly warrant a second series.
But we feel our opening season is pretty well put together. It’s just got a bit of everything!
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