A lovely tan, great teeth, well-maintained facial hair, a skin fade and tattoos.
These days, you can spot a Premier League footballer from a mile off. If you’re playing in England’s top-flight and you don’t have any of the above, you’re a black sheep.
Footballers don’t really come in all sorts of shapes and sizes. They’re all well-pampered and have incredible physiques.
But there is the odd exception.
In fact, according to Planet Football, there have been 19 notable exceptions down the years.
They named ’19 Premier League footballers who really don’t look like footballers’ and it’s a brilliant list.
Check it out:
Slightly chubby, balding from an early age and looking like somebody you’d beat every Friday night in the kebab shop.
Not many players can say they’ve played for Real Madrid, Bolton and Ipswich Town during their career. Not many can say they have a great big unmaintained afro, either.
Literally every Liverpool midfielder this century
Gary McAllister, Danny Murphy, Jay Spearing, Charlie Adam and Jonjo Shelvey. What do they all have in common? They’re all follically challenged and don’t look capable of running around a pitch for 90 minutes. In the case of Adam, that was probably all too true.
Kevin de Bruyne
A world-class footballer but a rare ginger-haired player who goes red in the face when he runs around too much.
Tom Davies looks like that guy you’d meet travelling in Australia. Just look at that hair - and his fashion sense is pretty outrageous too.
Just look at the size of him. The former Leicester player looks more like a bouncer than a footballer.
Raul Meireles was ahead of the curve in terms of tattoos but that haircut and beard combo was…unfamiliar.
Edwin van der Sar
It obviously helps to be tall as a goalkeeper but Edwin van der Sar would look more at home working for an IT company, than on a football pitch.
Perhaps it’s the fact he looks a bit like Gail Platt from Coronation Street.
The 5ft 6in midfielder doesn’t look like a footballer - and he doesn’t particularly act like one either.
The former Swansea player has braces - and that alone sees him make this list.
Obertan’s broad shoulders, narrow neck and massive head always looked a bit odd. He was probably too quick for his skills too as well as he failed to make the grade at Manchester United and Newcastle United.
Baines looks a bit like a rockstar with his outrageous sideburns and - in his early days - long hair.
We’re pretty sure Paterson is actually a rugby player, rather than a footballer.
He’s got the sleeve tattoos but Reid always looked as though he was carrying too much weight to be a pro.
The most expensive defender in the world looks like every other Sunday league central defender with that massive head.
Skinny with shaggy hair, Bullard played just how he looked - different but funny.
We’re saying nothing…
In truth, he looks a bit of a mess. Not to mention he wears his socks rolled down to his shins. Oh and his dress sense…
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