University student wrote 12,000-word dissertation about Rory Delap's long throw-ins


A lad has written his 12,000-word university dissertation about Rory Delap’s long throw-ins.

Yes, really.

The young chap, a University of Aberdeen student named George, shared the first page to his dissertation on Twitter and people can’t believe the description of the project.

It bears the title: “Blissful Ignorance: the Butterfly Effect’s place in Chaos Theory”.

Below that is a description that features words that quite frankly, shouldn’t be placed together in a sentence.

It reads: “A theoretical study into how the two goals scored by Stoke City straight from Rory Delap’s long throws in there 3-2 loss against Everton on the 14th of September 2008 directly led to Goldman Sachs and Morgan Stanley ceasing trading as investment banks on the 21st of September 2008”.

Wow. We need to read that.

The essay is 12,498 words. Quite how he’s managed that, we’ve no idea.

Delap is even aware of his involvement in the dissertation.

Delay’s long throws have a special place in English football folklore.

They are truly iconic, with Sky Sports even publishing a video of every goal Stoke City scored from them.

Indeed, former Arsenal manager Arsene Wenger tried to get throw-ins banned after facing Stoke.

Ex-Stoke boss Tony Pulis revealed on That Peter Crouch Podcast: “Wenger came one year and complained about the grass being too long. He wrote a letter to the FA. The referees and the linesman had to come and measure the grass.

“I know he talked about banning throw-ins and saying they shouldn’t be allowed. That was all music to our ears.”

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